just noticed that i have not blogged much for quite some time. oh well. have been busy and so on. well just spent most of my time in school due to some activities i guess. just been feeling vexed all ovr again and the pressure's getting into me. i don' know why. sighs. lets not get into the saddening details.

ah! is my face that scary and black! darn! scared thevi and vicki today! man. i was jst stoning in their direction without smiling! do i really look that dao and everything? sighs. maybe that's the reason why some people refuse to approach me. cause they are just too scared of me. i guess i am fierce and scary. but when i am quiet i am just there. stoning and thinking about some stuff. i'm not angry with anyone i swear! and when i am crappy and crazy, you will not want to know me. haha!!

classes have been fine for this week. so far so good. but i have been getting more and more tired nowadays. just happen to stone while faci was talking today. i couldn't help it. i was just too tired. but at least i managed to grasp and understand the concept well! lucky i wasn't having computing today. or else i will stone more.

saw ee ling in formal today. she look nice. and she cheated me. =( bleh. and on mon she jabbed me! i am not that bully-able ok!

i know that my skills for vball improved abit but i still lack lotsa training! i will continue to improve. i will prove to those who look down on me wrong! i will do it! gonna have a little extra training tomorrow! confidence play a huge part in improvement. don't be afraid to try. i'm glad that some ppl's opnion on me improved bby a little. at least that's what i see. i hope that i am not wrong. *praying hard and rossing my fingers.

i'm trying my best to forget. but it's hard ya. i see you around so often. but that doesn't mean anything ya. it's just like causing my heart to sink deeper and deeper at times. and it's getting heavier and heavier too! what am i supposed to do? sighs. i guess i made a right choice of at least trying not to ignore you and see you in the face at times. the only thing i can do is to brace myself up to whatever challenges that is to come. what else can i do right? =( denial sucks. why must you live in it? why must you do that to me? m favourite phrase. so near yet so far. and it is really describing how things are going now. sighs

i wanna breath. i wanna know that i am alive again. i wanna know that you still care, do you? why does things seem so obvious and not obvious all at the same time? why are you doing these to me all over again. sighs

suddenly, i feel so lost. what am i suppose to do. it's just like i lost direction inwhere i am going. and the only thing i know is that i wanna studt damn hard and get a good degree or higher qualification, and be a good player in vball. other than that i am totally lost, no direction in friendships, relationships and many other things!

madeline.
03031988.
katongconvent.
republic poly.
volleyball.





WISHES
smiles.
grow taller? HAHA.
laptop.
travelling.
uni.
many many other wants. =)



-andrew goh.
-andrew tan.
-caleb.
-chinglin.
-debbie.
-eeling.
-gary.
-gillian.
-guoyong.
-ivy.
-janis.
-junguang.
-kelly.
-laura.
-lixian.
-matilda.
-mel.
-rena.
-serene.
-shaun.
-shirui.
-shuhui.
-shuhui kc.
-shuzhen.
-sophia.
-soonwei.
-vansoh.
-wilson.
-yichao.
-yikai.
-zhehang.