what shall i say today? i'm rather speechless. ya. there isnt any particular reason for it. not sad or elated. just a pure sense of neutrality. flashbacks of the past suddenly appeared. i guess i aint that nonchalant after all, though i am trying hard to strive on. so much for telling someone else that the eyes are at the front of your head for a purpose; to prevent you from turning back. sounded cliche. there's a vast difference from you consoling others to cheer them up, and you yourself taking in all these pep talks. why is this so?

woke up at twelve or one plus today. surprisingly it wasnt four. haha. woke up to eat only. how piggish can i get? my sis finally got discharged and came home already! was like hugging and playing with her for like hours. haha. took a cab down to church, have not ben doing this for a long long time. just wanted to sit in the cab and look at the surroundings. just wanted to clear my mind. but most important reason was that i was almost late for my service. haha! woke my black jacket. it seemed so abandoned and hard from one's view. bah.

saw owner's blog entry. sounded sad. rah! i understand how she feels; i wish to help. but i don't think i can help her. except for some stuff only. both of us are in the same boat experiencing the same thing, it's just that the issues are different or the situations are different. =(

i kept thinking. kept searching for an answer. but i still arrive back at square one time and time again. how i wish there were more clues to everything so i won't be so lost. sighs. other than thinking about the many alternatiove and possibilties, i don't konw what else i can do. unless i get assurance. even if i do, i'll tend to avoid. i need time to absorb everything down, and in the process i end up hurting someone. bah. sighs. but i really need the time. i am sorry ya. =i don't know what else i can say beside that for the time being, also sorry for being so nonchalant all the time ya. i just din know how to react. when i do, others will be there to destroy everything. i am sorry. =(

madeline.
03031988.
katongconvent.
republic poly.
volleyball.





WISHES
smiles.
grow taller? HAHA.
laptop.
travelling.
uni.
many many other wants. =)



-andrew goh.
-andrew tan.
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-chinglin.
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-eeling.
-gary.
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-guoyong.
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-lixian.
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